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Disconnected 

 

Five weeks down and five to go! I’m half way!!!

I wish I could be more Zen about my life but I’m more WWIII. Every weekend I drop my shoulders and let out a big sigh of relief for surviving the week!

I’m still working, still never know what I’ll be doing and still don’t know about that project I was working on. It’s not an ideal situation but I am grateful for my job. I need all the money I can get, especially when Ram might be in the US sooner than anticipated. This week I got the approval notice for our immigrant petition! It took less than a month to get approved! We were expecting it to take at least three months. This means that Ram can now apply for an immigrant visa! But, before he can do that I have to get a letter from the National Visa Center informing us that the NVC has received and registered our case; which can take 30-60 days. So, for now, more waiting but the rest of the visa process (from what we’ve heard) takes about three months. It’s possible Ram could be here by spring.

This separation from Ram I’ve felt more disconnected than ever. I’ve been questioning my sanity more than ever. The last couple weeks my dream activity has been extreme. I usually never remember dreams but I’ve remembered one or more every night and some feel so real that I wake up. One night I dreamt someone was walking around the house so I called out “Ram?!” And woke myself up calling out his name. Two nights ago I was spending the night at my brothers when I was awoken by a mouse crawling up the side of my face! I looked all over the room, but no mouse. I asked Aaron if he’d ever seen any around the apartment but no, never. It also wouldn’t make sense for a mouse to be in a room which food is never in. I’m still not sure what happened but I’ve had many mice crawl across my head (while camping), so I know what it feels like. The stress and disarray I feel makes it hard to remember our connection. I feel detached. My plan is to force myself to make daily meditation a habit. When I do meditate I enjoy it and I KNOW it will help in every aspect of my life. I will quiet my mind by imaging I’m a big lazy lion living on the Savanna. I’ll bask in the sun and nap in the shade of big trees. My pack will bring me food and I’ll eat my fill.

Life, it’s so much simpler on the Savanna.

P.S. Happy Halloween!

In the spirit of Halloween here’s a video of big scary wolves!

Wolf Haven Sanctuary #wolfhaven #wolf #wildanimals #beautiful #wild #befree #sad #majestic #amazing

A post shared by Karra Suzanne (@karra_suzanne) on

Aren’t they so beautiful and majestic?!
This weekend I visited my brother Aaron in Olympia for Halloween. Yesterday he surprised me with a tour of “Wolf Haven”, a wolf sanctuary. It was really cool and interesting! A little sad that they’re in cages but from what the tour guide told us it was that or being put down. 49 out of 50 of the wolves in the sanctuary are captive born and failed pets.

If you want you can check our their website: http://wolfhaven.org/

 

 

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