I’ve been home for about five days now. The trip home was long and exhausting and the jet lag has been brutal. I keep falling asleep around 7pm and waking up at 3am.
Here is a little recap of how I got home:
It was hardly Thursday when our alarm sounded at 1:45am. I was so anxious I hardly slept. With squinted eyes we stumbled out of bed. Ram drove us to Binyamina where we took a train to Tel-Aviv airport. He waited with me until I had my bag checked and my boarding ticket in hand; I was very grateful. I wanted every second possible with him. Once I reached the dreaded security door we hugged, kissed and said goodbye. With tears in my eyes I turned away and didn’t look back; I couldn’t look back. The suffocating pain and fear of leaving started to creep up for a few moment before I suppressed it.
I took a 4 hour flight from Tel-Aviv to Frankfurt, an 11 hour flight to Seattle and a 4 hour bus ride to Yakima. During my long flight I flew on an airline I’d never been on and I’ll probably never be on again. They charged for everything extra. For example: you needed to pay if you wanted to choose your seat, watch movies (other than the two they provided which was some stupid Garfield movie and Deathly Hollows Part 1) or eat food other than the two tiny terrible meals they served. I never have high expectations for airplane food but theirs was exceptionally bad. Maybe they were low on food supplies?
I might have slept for two hours but in ten minute increments. Once I landed in Seattle and got through customs I had two and a half hours till my shuttle to Yakima. Normally it takes two and half hours but because of traffic it took four. After 30 hours I arrived in Yakima at 9pm (7am Friday in Israel). My parents greeted me warmly and drove me home.
It’s weird to be back. It’s a big transition that will take awhile to get in sync with. Going from Israel to the US, and from living with Ram to living with my parents is a big shift in my reality. On top of that, I’m also job searching. Such change is stressful and scary. Fear of the unknown looms over me. But, this isn’t my first rodeo. I think I’ve gained a little wisdom in accepting and handling change during these last couple of years.
I’d like to force everything into place, so I can feel comfortable, but I won’t. Making a decision out of fear would be ignoring everything I’ve learned about intuition and synchronicity.
“Never let your fear decide your future” -Anonymous